10/19/2008

Hey everyone! :) Today was a decent day! I woke up and was super excited to head to my first baby shower! My friends Jessica, Sam, Kellie and Eunice threw it for me. It was alot of fun and I got alot of stuff that will help out alot with Gabriel. Thankyou so much to everyone who went and got things for me & my little man. I appreciate it so much you have no idea! The shower just made me so much more excited for him to be here. You have no idea... lol. I came home and have three exams to study for, and I went straight to his room and just started unpacking. I know... such a procrastinator :) I can't help it. LOL.



Now I'm trying to study. I'm so not looking forward to this week. I can't wait till Thursday already... that means I'll be done! I have three exams. Two on Tuesday and one on Wednesday and a huge paper due on Thursday. Blah! Hopefully I can wing it and get a decent grade. My last exam I studied my butt off for and got an A-! I don't think that will be happening for these ones. LOL.

Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment. I'm excited to check up on my little man. :) It's just a checkup so nothing too important. I didn't talk to BD today yet again. What's new? He wanted to go to the appointment tomorrow, but I can't go get him so he probably won't go. And I don't plan on initiating any type of conversation with him, so if he doesn't text me then he's obviously not going. Oh well. I'm starting to get used to it. Sad but true. It's funny though cause he has on his facebook, "Both names tatted on my arms forever, so much love in my soul wish I could put em together." Whatever that means... I know he thinks about it. I mean... never did I do wrong to this stupid boy [yeah violent terms because I'm so irritated... Gabriel deserves better than what he's giving him right now]. But I mean there's only so much I can do. I am only one person, and I think I'm doing a pretty DARN good job doing this alone. I'm still in school... still in work... and 8 going on 9 months pregnant. Not many woman can say they are able to do this.

I found a couple of songs that fit me perfect at this moment in my life.

One is called Heart of the Matter by Indie Arie: "I've been learning to live without you now. But I miss you sometimes. The more I know, the less I understand. All the things I thought I knew I'm learning them again. I've been trying to get down to the Heart of the Matter..." Another is Rehab by Rihanna: "I guess this is what I get for wishful thinking, I should've never let you enter my door." And there's a couple other songs, Cry by Rihanna and If I Were a Boy by Beyonce. All of these songs have kinda been my anthem the last couple of days :) LOL.

Well I'm off to studying and reading for a bit more. Then going to bed. :) Sweet dreams.